“It’s all about accepting yourself the way you are. If you want to work towards a better you in any regard, do it. But right now you’re okay just the way you are.”
This is what Tess Holliday said in one of her interviews. Tess is an American plus-size model, blogger, and make-up artist who believes that looks don’t really matter compared to who you are as a person. She follows body positivity to her very best. For those who aren’t well acquainted with the term body positivity, let me tell you. Body positivity refers to the assertion that all people deserve to have a positive body image, regardless of how society views ideal shape, size, and appearance. It might look really easy to say that you should love yourself regardless of what our society tells us, but in reality, it is difficult. Almost every single person out here has sooner or later felt insecure about their looks or their body type. And like every single person out here, I’m no stranger to that feeling.
A lot of people don’t know that I’ve been this healthy since I was a child and there really isn’t much that I can do except take care of myself but people have always failed to understand that. All my school life, I’ve been bullied for being this fat kid, and all my life I had been scared of standing up for myself, even though I stood up for my friends. I have always been called out on how fat I looked, the fact that I have a lot of acne on my face and I should apply this, that, and whatnot. I’ve been told that I really shouldn’t try playing sports because people will notice how fat I am. There have been times when I’ve been told that I should lose weight because my cellulite is visible or how I should not wear sleeveless tops because I have stretch marks. And honestly speaking all of these things have affected me in ways I wish no one else has to go through. There came a time when I absolutely hated myself every time I looked in the mirror. I tried to go on diets. I even starved myself for 3 days at a stretch in the hopes of losing weight and trust me when I say this, it was the worst feeling ever. I starved myself for people who are no longer in my life. I tried so many times to fit in those L-size jeans. Eat a little less, cover my face with makeup a little more, stay at home a little more, talk a little less and smile a little less.
But as time went by, I realized that people who actually love you and value you will always want you around and you being a size S/M/L/XL won’t matter, you being YOU is all that will matter. I agree that self-love and body positivity isn’t easy to believe but it’s one of the most wonderful things you can do for yourself. The thing is that in today's time almost everyone is going through some issue, and almost everyone is hurting. Most of the time when people tend to say hurtful things to others even if they don’t really mean them, it’s because they are hurt themselves. With time I realized that I need to change. Not for others, but for me. And when I say change, I don’t mean looks, I mean change in the direction of my personality development, growing my confidence, filling my life with more self-love, and with people who love me for who I am as a person and not for my looks. I also came to realize that in order to love who I am, I cannot hate the experiences that shaped me. I cannot forget the times people have mistreated me for my looks but what I can do is forgive them, even when they didn’t apologize because I deserve peace more than anything else.
There are still days when it gets a little hard and what people say about me, gets to me. But I’ve improved, I may not be perfect but then again, are we always supposed to be perfect?
To the person reading this, know that this world can be an ugly place to be in, but being you and loving yourself is going to give you the courage to face the world a little better. Stay you. Stay beautiful.
Author – Haripriya Mehra, Illustrated by – Rishabh Aggarwal
Comments